Chances are you aren't going to meet a person who openly admits to not wanting to end rape, but you'd be surprized how many people are actually afraid of ending it.  Not directly, however, but indirectly.  People are quite afraid of change, actually. 

Rape Culture.  Sounds kind of scary doesn't it?  America perpetuates and supports a rape culture.  What exactly is a rape culture?  A rape culture is a culture which allows or condones rape to happen.  Magazine ads, television ads, and stereotypes which objectify and degrade women are part of this rape culture.  The American culture has been shaped around the degradation of women for centuries.  In "Killing Us Softly 3" Jean Kilborne uses about 160 ads from the media to link violence against women to media objectification.  The media projects an image of a perfectly thin woman who deserves nothing more than to be a slave to a man. The increasing appearance of a woman looking like a battering victim in the media is a cause for alarm.  This only validates thoughts of women as either weak or objects to satisfy the desires of men.  I hate to shatter your image of women, but we are not here for that.

So, don't like something, change it right?  Easier said than done.  Many people hold tight to the norm.  No one like radical change.  By changing what is "attractive" apparently this means offending someone.  But offending women by degrading them to mere objects of sexuality is ok, right?  Wrong.  Ok, lets get some examples in here.

I'm walking on campus one day with some friends.  Both male.  One is talking about a date he has that night with a girl.  The other friend is joking around with him and says that the couple should come to a party and get the girl drunk.  That way she's more willing to do "stuff".  I tell them that's not cool.  Both look at me quizzically, asking me why.  "Because that's rape."  "What?  No one is raping anyone." one of my male companions replies.  I inform them that having sex with a girl while she is intoxicated is, in fact, rape.  Getting her drunk for that sole purpose is wrong.  Their reply?  "lighten up."  Mind you, these two guys later appoligize to me.

This example is something that is not unique to me.  This happens on most college campuses and, indeed, outside of college campuses as well.  And it needs to end. 

"But I'm a guy.  It's not my problem."  WRONG.  It is definitly your problem.  You are feared.  Do you like that feeling?  You are feared to be a rapists, even though you may not be.  If you don't like it, change it.  Guys are more likely to listen to other guys than to girls.  Why?  Peer pressure.  Use it to your advantage.  Also, while the majority of rapes are committed by men with women as the victim, a percentage are men on men, women on men, or even women on men.  You could be a victim as well and it is just about someone taking advantage of a weaker person.  Spread the word that this is not acceptable. 

Women, obviously, have been fighting this for years.  But that doesn't mean that we are turning the problem over to men now.  Because we can NOT.  Prevention is not just telling women how to defend themselves.  It's going out and changing perceptions.  Defy the perception that women are sex objects.  Go out in what YOU want, wear what you want.  Be confident.  Contradict men when they say something derogatory.  Don't be afraid to stand up for yourself.  It is not acceptable that it happens and we can change that.

 

Let me take some time to get into a topic that is well undernoticed in society.  Women are not always the victims.  Men are not always the perpetrators.  Women can rape men.  Women can rape women.  Men can rape men.  And it is just as much of a problem.  It is much worse than the statistics show because of homophobia, heterosexism, and underreporting.  Also, the fact that it is basically ignored makes it impossible for the problem to be solved.  Do not ignore it.  To ignore it is to compound the problem.  Do not ignore it. 

 

Hopefully if you are reading this than you are in the same game as I am, the one out to abolish rape.  Change the culture from the inside.  Change the rape culture and show that this is NOT acceptable.  At all.